Everybody knows a perfectionist right? He or she is that person that has a lot of pressure on themselves to do everything to an extremely high standard. They can be wonderful but also extremely infuriating to the non-perfectionist. They can be infuriating for a number of reasons. Let me explain:
1. Because they tend to avoid conflict it is hard to discuss things with them,
2. They try to please everyone so they are often running around like a headless chook doing hundreds of things for other people and forgetting to rest and then getting grumpy and exhausted
3. Alternatively they are so anxious about making a mistake or being judged in a negative light that they spend periods of time avoiding everyone,
4. It is also hard to give them constructive feedback about things that will help them, as due to their sensitivity to criticism it often causes them to dissolve into tears.
HOWEVER, there are some pluses to being around a perfectionist, namely that because they have very high standards for themselves they do tend to do most things to a high standard which can actually be nice to be on the receiving end of. For example, when you go to their place for dinner, it is rare that you will be sitting around the house having pizza out of the box in your undies or eating last nights’ cold leftovers. More likely they will throw and amazing dinner party and not ask you to bring a plate or help clean up. Also, if you were to ask them to edit your essay or resume its likely that they will leave no stone unturned in this endeavour.
What I am saying is that having high standards for oneself does not have to be a bad thing in itself. It is just that one must know when to stop and take the pressure off oneself. It is great to want to do more than pizza out of the box when friends come over for tea, however if you insist on doing a whole host of intricate recipes on your own and end up frazzled and stressed out, and this grumpiness or anxiety effects your enjoyment of the night, then you have gone too far with it. And it is no fun feeling so anxious that you avoid others, or that you can’t talk through issues with a person which affects the intimacy of your relationships. So my advice is, do wonderful things but don’t put so much weight into it that you stop enjoying it. A bit of levity is important as life is there to be enjoyed. C’est la vie!!
Killing the Perfectionist Within 